Because one thing went wrong

The past two days I've had one little thing go wrong, several times, that has totally caused a domino effect upon the preceding events.  Here are the four different accounts... (if you don't want to read all of them, the first one is the best :)
Yesterday morning I tiredly woke up after a rough night with kids to my alarm.  I had to get Lily out the door to school, so my goal was to quickly get her breakfast, do her hair and go back to bed.  I set the timer on the microwave so she would know when to get her coat and shoes on and to go catch the bus (about 7:58).  After doing what I needed to do I started walking back to my room and heard Sophie crying.  I knew it was a little early for her to be up for the day, so I fed her hoping she'd fall back asleep and I could still climb back in bed myself.  She seemed iffy on falling back to sleep, but I put her back to bed anyway.  I decided to throw a load of laundry in the washer and was getting Lily some cough drops before I climbed back in bed.  I noticed she still had six or seven minutes before the timer was to beep and she was all ready to go, just waiting.  However, as I walked down the hall I heard a loud vehicle outside that sounded a lot like the bus.  I looked at the timer with still several minutes to go, but then looked at the clock, it was 8:03!  We ran to the door just in time to see the bus driving past our house and around the corner.  I told Lily to jump into the van and we'd try to catch it at the next stop.  However, as we turned the corner, there was no bus to be seen. Hoping my other three kids were still asleep (usually one of them is up by this point), I called my neighbor next door and told her what happened and that I was taking Lily to school (I was half way there by this point).  I told her the garage code and mentioned the key pad is a little tricky and had to be opened just right to work.  I dropped Lily off at school (several minutes early and still no bus in sight) and headed home.  As I approached the house I saw my neighbor and her husband walking over to my place.  As I pulled up she said she couldn't get the garage key pad to work, so I showed her what she did wrong and how it's sensitive.  I then ran in the house to see if any kids had woken up during the eight or so minutes I was gone.  Sure enough I heard crying.  It was Cedric.  He was sitting on the steps to the basement just bawling.  I gave him a hug and he said he needed a Kleenex.  Luckily Sophie really did fall back asleep and Jeff was still asleep.  So I had a crazy morning all because I did my math wrong and set the timer a few minutes too many.  I'm just glad I heard the bus and Lily didn't go out to the bus stop and wait for who knows how long before realizing it had already left.
Then Last night we were cooking homemade pizzas.  While the first batch was cooking I started to smell burning.  We opened the oven to find the pizzas almost black.  Our bottom burner must've burned out and so the top burner had broiled the pizzas.  I called all my neighbors close by and finally got a hold of one who was nice enough to let us cook the other tray of pizzas in their oven.  So I was running back and forth, in the snow trying to cook our dinner.  By the time we actually ate it was about 7:30 and our house stunk like burnt.  All because our lower burner went out.
This morning I woke up, again very tired and ended up hitting snooze one too many times.  I woke up with only 15 minutes until Lily was to catch the bus.  I knew I had turned on her alarm last night and she is an early riser anyway, but the house seemed extra quiet.  I went down to find her still sound asleep in bed!  I woke her up and told her to hurry and get dressed and to be up stairs in five minutes. I was determined to not have her miss the bus two days in a row. She said she had turned her alarm on last night too, so what I think happened is I turned it on, and she turned it off.  Anyway, I whipped together an egg and nuked it in the microwave since I knew she could eat it real fast.  Luckily I had done her hair last night, so I just had to re-do it this morning while she ate.  Miraculously she made the bus barely on time.  But it was another crazy morning just because we had both been efficient with turning her alarm on (or off in this case).
Today was also our preschool field trip to V Chocolates factory (which gave us lots of yummy samples if you ever want to go tour it yourself).  However, as we were running out the door and loading all the kids in the various cars, Jeff decided he needed to use the bathroom.  While trying to hurry he hadn't quite pulled his pants far enough down and ended up having an accident.  So I had to tell all the other parents to hang on while I ran and got him new pants, quickly put them on him and his socks and shoes again.  It ended up being a great field trip regardless, but was a rough start all because Jeff had to go to the bathroom, but went a little too quickly.

Look to God and Live

I was asked to speak at our Stake Relief Society Seminar last night.  The theme of the seminar was "Look to God and Live".  I was asked to speak on how I've grown closer to Christ since loosing my mom.  I felt my talk went really well and I wanted to share it with you.

In my favorite hymn we sing the words "I Believe in Christ, so come what may..."  This statement has become truer to me and my family in the past five months than ever before.  In the past five months my relationship with my Savior has changed. 

There are three principles I've developed a greater understanding of during this short time in my life than I've ever developed in the 30+ years I've been learning the Gospel.  These principles include...

 1) The Lord will always be there for us, no matter our trials.

2)  Our Savior is real.  He lives.  He is mindful of us.  Same with our Father in Heaven.

3) The Plan of Salvation is so simple.  Our time on the earth is just a small part of it.

Let me back up to my life a little over  five months ago.  It was September 11th.  The world was mourning the sad tragedy that had happened to our country just ten years earlier.  Little did I know that by the time the day was over, I would be mourning  a much more personal loss.  The night of that somber Sunday I received the tragic news that while my parents were driving down to St. George in a rainstorm, they lost control of the car and went off the road causing a terrible car accident.  My dad was okay, he had been taken to the hospital in St. George with just bumps and bruises.  My mom on the other hand had died instantly in the crash.  That night my life changed.  My mom was a healthy, young, beautiful woman.  To have her taken so suddenly from our lives was such a shock. 

However, as hard as it's been to lose someone I love so much, I have grown so much closer to my Savior. 

As I mentioned I've developed a greater understanding that the Lord will always be there for us, no matter our trials.    It doesn't matter if we are dealing with a trial as simple as trying to calm a fussy baby in the middle of the night.  Or a big 'Job'-like trial where we lose everything important to us,  He will be there.

The week of the funeral, and even weeks after that we could feel the prayers of others making us strong and able to get through the hardship.  We heard of people all over the world who were praying for us and including our names in the temple prayer role.  If you know of anyone going through a hard trial, pray for them, they will feel it.

The Lord will never give us more than we can handle.  My brother shared a story with me where he was having a discouraging time missing our mom and worrying about his career and future.  After praying, the spirit directed him to the scripture found in Mosiah 24: 13-15.

13 And it ^acame to pass that the voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort, for I know of the covenant which ye have made unto me; and I will covenant with my people and deliver them out of bondage.

 14 And I will also ease the ^aburdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as^bwitnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their ^cafflictions.

 15 And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did^astrengthen them that they could bear up their ^bburdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with ^cpatience to all the will of the Lord.

  My brother felt so much peace and comfort knowing Christ would ease his burdens and was there for him as he went through his trials.  All of us have this promise if we keep our covenants with Him too. 

Another thing my family has realized is how adaptable humans are.  This is one of the great blessings we've been given as Christ's most intelligent creations, to adapt.  It is one of the ways we are able to handle life's trials.  Life has gone on since my mom passed.  As much as we wish her here, we've adapted.  We've learned to look to others for 'mom' advice, celebrate the holidays eating on paper plates instead of fine china, accepting her presence at baptisms and baby blessings as feelings instead of physically being there.  Even my dad has learned how to shop for grandkids Christmas and birthday presents, do the laundry and host family get-togethers.  We've adapted and it's helped us get through our trials.

The second thing I've learned is our Savior is real.  He lives and is mindful of us.  Same with our Father in Heaven. 

I've noticed that my prayers are different.  When I talk to my Heavenly Father, I feel like he is so much closer and real to me than he was before.  I feel that losing my mom has changed this for me.  I struggle knowing how to describe it.  I know my mom.  She is a real person.  I know without a doubt she is still a person, but in the spirit world.  I know she is still real.  Because I know this about her, it helps me grasp the understanding that my Father in Heaven and my brother, Jesus Christ are also real.  They are there too.  I know our Savior is a resurrected being who has a body.  I feel like my mom is just an arm's reach away, therefore I've felt my Savior and Father in Heaven are also just an arm's reach away.  When I pray, I feel them so close to me.  My faith has grown immensely.  In 3 Nephi 18:20 it says... 

 And ^awhatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, which is right, believing that ye shall receive, behold it shall be given unto you.

 I've learned that when I've asked for righteous desires, he's blessed me with them.  Even asking to know that my mom is spiritually with us has been a great blessing. 

My nephew was recently baptized.  This was one of those events where we missed our mom.  Especially since the last time we saw her was at my daughter's baptism the day before the accident.  My sister prayed to know when my mom would be there as we were sure she would be.  During the opening song the spirit was overpowering, I was crying and couldn't get through the song.  My dad and sister were sitting quite far from us.  Afterward, we were talking and my sister mentioned that she felt Mom's presence during the opening song, so had my dad (we joked it was just like Mom to come late to a meeting during the opening song).  This experience was a testimony to me that my sister's prayer was answered.  Even though we were not sitting together, we all felt her presence at the same time.

So many times I feel the Lord is using my mom to help answer my prayers.  There's been several times where I've heard in my head "be patient" or "calm down, it will be okay", but they come as my mom's voice, not my own.  I feel this has been a blessing that not only brought me comfort knowing she still cares for me, but it has also helped my testimony and faith of prayer increase.

Reading the scriptures has also become more real for me too.  When I read accounts in the scriptures about the Savior, whether it be when He visited the Nephites in America, or when he showed himself to the brother of Jared, my heart swells.  It burns with the excitement that these people were able to experience seeing the Savior.  I long for my chance to see Him too.

The third thing I've learned is the Plan of Salvation is so simple.  Our time on the earth is just a small part of it.

  When my mom passed away I was six months pregnant with our fourth child.  That life growing inside me was such a comfort to me.  I felt like I was dealing with the grief so much better than some of the others in my family and I think that baby was a big part of it.  I knew that my daughter was alive in the pre-mortal world, waiting for her turn on this earth.  At the same time, my mom was just entering the post-mortal world ready to take on her next assignment in the eternities.  Again, we knew my mom would be there when our daughter entered the world.  I remember when she was born the room seemed completely quiet and peaceful.  The spirit was so strong and it felt as though the room was full of people.  I know that not only was my mom there to bring this child into the world, but I'm sure many other loved ones were present also.  Knowing someone who has just started their time in mortality and someone who has just left it makes the Plan of Salvation seem so simple.  I long more now than ever for our Savior to come again.  To think it could be another 50 years or more before I see my mom again hurts, but at the same time I know, as it says in D&C 121:7

...thine afflictions shall be but a ^csmall moment.

 This life is but a small moment.  I have a testimony that we can be a family forever.  The knowledge I have of our Heavenly Father and Saviors plan for us has been the greatest blessing to me during these past months.  I don't know how I would get through it without the gospel in my life.  Looking to God has helped me live through the toughest five months of my life.

"I believe in Christ, so come what may."

-In the Name of Jesus Christ, Amen. 

Lily's Recording Session

Several months ago Lily and her friend, Mily wrote a song on the bus together called "The Best Friends Song".  Lily used the composition, transposed it to piano and entered it in the reflections contest.  Our wonderful neighbor, Russ was nice enough to let her use his basement studio (he is a professional composer) to record it for Reflections.  He also told her that one day she could come back and do a voice recording too.   So on Saturday, that's what we did.

 Lily was so excited and it was so fun to hear her giggles echo in the recording mics.  She sang the song with her accompaniment, and also A Capella.  Russ also suggested that Lily and I sing together.  As embarrassing as it was, I am really glad we did it together.  I would love it if I had a CD of my mom and I singing together.

He put together a CD with the variety of recordings and gave it to Lily.  She asked him if he knew anyone that worked for the radio station that could put her song on the radio :)  He told her he did know someone and would ask, but couldn't make any promises.
I also videoed Lily singing along with her recording so I could put it on YouTube and she could be "famous" that way.  Other than the intro the entire song is written by, accompanied by and performed by Lily.

Sophie's Blessing & Other Pictures

Sophie is now a month and a half old.  She weighs around 13lbs and is starting to smile and coo.  Here are a few pictures of her at one month.  

Here she is in her bath.  She loves it as long as she's not cold.  

Nana (Tom's mom) made the girls matching skirts.  Here they are showing them off.

I took a bunch of pictures of Sophie at six weeks old.  She was so happy and smiley for the pictures.

This one is my favorite!

I love this outfit I put together using different black and white items people gave us.

Sunday was Sophie's blessing day.  We had so many friends and family come out ans support us.
While we were together my sister and I got a picture together.  We are each other's only sister, we look and act nothing alike, but we are best friends.  She's six years older than me and has really been a great support to me since we lost our mom.

Sophie's blessing went very well.  

Here she is with Dad...

and Mom

Her brothers...

and sister

Our four sweet children!

Here's the best one we got of the whole family.  Unfortunately we just did the pictures in Sophie's room, so it's not the best background and Sophie was hungry and started to get fussy.  

Nana also made Sophie's dress.  She is so talented with a sewing machine and made all my kids blessing outfits.

I've recently started using Picasa Web Albums to store my pictures on.  I discovered this really fun editing link that lets you do fun things with pictures.  Here are some pictures I've doctored up with it. The one above of Sophie I added a fun border.

I took pictures of all four kids in the bath tub.  I wanted to frame them and put them up in the bathroom as decor.  Unfortunately, I didn't get one good picture of all the kids together.  So I took the best one of the girls and the best one of the boys and figured I'd crop them and put them side by side on the wall to make it look like the whole bathtub.  Here's how they look with some fun editing...

I did the whole family in black and white, excepts Sophie's face.  I just wish she was happier in this one...

My favorite picture of Sophie cropped and with a matte finish.  I'm probably going to frame this one.

Hard Boiled Eggs

One thing my mom was always good at was cooking a hard boiled egg.  Since this is one of my boys favorites, I think I finally mastered how to do it.

  

Put eggs into a pan with water and a little vinegar (vinegar helps them peel easier).  Cover and bring to a boil.  Once the water hits a rapid boil, quickly turn off heat.  Leave pan covered and let eggs sit for 15-20 minutes in the simmering pan. 

When trying to get eggs out of the pan, I use a spaghetti spoon.  It works perfectly!

Put eggs in a bowl and place the bowl in the fridge.  

Once they have cooled, hit both the top and bottom of the egg to crack.  

Then roll the egg pressing gently to crack it all around.  

Start peeling the egg from the widest top side first.  

If the eggs are too fresh, they will be harder to peel.  The longer eggs cool, the easier they peel.  Waiting at least a full day is ideal.  I've also heard boiling older eggs help too.

Still Hard

Although it's been almost five months since my mom passed away, it's still been hard.  In fact, it seems that since Sophie was born I've had a harder time.  I don't know if having that sweet spirit so close to me while pregnant brought comfort, if it's my hormones going crazy with having a fourth child, or if the length of time has made me miss her more, but I've really missed her lately.  The littlest things set me off and I just start crying again.  One of them being the fact that Sophie will never know my mom while growing up on this earth.  
My dad's been dating a lot.  He went on his first date the beginning of November and has been on an average of a date a week since then.  He's like a 16 year old, so excited to share the stories with us from each of his dates.  It's been good to see him get out, have fun and meet new people.  However, lately it's been hard on me.  He's been busy with his dates, and he loves talking about them.  I'm happy for him, but it's just one of those things that's now different in my life.  I know when he gets real serious with someone it will be an adjustment too.
Sometimes I just feel so anxious to see my mom again.  The thought of having to be patient for a possibility of 50+ years is so hard sometimes.  I long to see her, yet I'm grateful so much more for the family I have still with me.  A lot of my tears go to my dad.  Despite dating again, he misses my mom so much and loves her so much that a lot of my tears go towards his loss.  It makes me grateful I have Tom.  I'm so grateful for my four healthy children too.  I've developed an even greater love for my dad and siblings.  I feel that even my relationship with my Heavenly Father is greater.  I'm so glad I've been blessed with the promise that I'll have an eternal family.  I can't imagine how much harder this loss would be without the Gospel Principles I've been taught and believe in.  I know life will continue to be hard.  I'm thankful for the trials we are given as they make us grow, appreciate and love more.
Mom, know I still miss you.  I love you and I'm grateful that I was able to have you in my life for the 32 years that I did.  You've made me want to be a better mom, wife and someday grandma.  I love you!  Love, Tami